Ciao Bellas!

The time has come, the blogger said, to write of many things. Of long haul flights in economy, of Big Macs, and Queens. Ok, so I’m no Lewis Carroll – sue me! But the lowdown is the same nonetheless -- I’m heading home!

Chances are that by the time you have read this, I will be on my way to the Nairobi airport for my two-day trip back to Toronto (Have I mentioned that the flight from Dubai to New York is 14 hours long and that Hubby won’t let me upgrade?!).

I will try to blog regularly during home leave but probably not every day. Sorry. ☹ But keep checking in as I will be sure to share stories about preflight drinks at Mercury’s Cosmo night, that 14 hour ride in coach, seeing my family after another year away, shopping, my parents’ 40th anniversary, reuniting with Hubby when he joins me at the end of June, finally having Mexican food when we get to Illinois, shopping, meeting FIL 2.0, Vegas and its Mario Batali wonderfulness, shopping, seeing The Guys in Portland, and lots of other good gossip.

Please wish me a safe flight and I’ll be seeing you all soon.

Your favorite Blogger B!tch is outtie… for now.

Cute Shoes

I was going to blog about my brother, BBS, and his tough life: “I was at work last night in Paris, on the Champs d'Elysée for a cocktail party.” Then I was going to blog about how I don’t really want to go home because I’m a sap who is going to miss her sweetie… Oh, and I’ll miss Hubby too.

So instead of writing, I started chatting with ‘Ren online. (Yeah, her again.) After chatting about our usual witty nonsense, I asked her if bringing three pairs of shoes home with me was going over board. ‘Ren was surprised that I wasn’t going to bring more shoes and asked me about the shoes I packed. When I mentioned my cute Docs, she insisted that Doc Martins didn’t come in cute varieties.

And that’s when I found my next pair of shoes. *cue heavenly music* Aren’t they gorgeous?! Plus they come in a really pretty shade of brown. *happy girly sigh* Of course I have no idea how much they cost. Nor do I know if they even sell them in the States but… I want them!!! *sob*

One Hour Later: I found another pair of shoes. The second pair is also cute and slightly more formal. Maybe I can buy both pairs!!!

What do you think? Are these the cutest shoes ever to bear the Doc Martin brand? Or is it just me?

Explosion in Nairobi - Again

By now many of you have probably heard about the bombing, which occurred this morning in Nairobi. The explosion occurred downtown near the Ambassador Hotel during rush hour in a very busy area. My driver, P, in between calls from loved ones ringing to make sure he was okay, said that the matatu depot near there is always packed at that hour or morning.

As I write this, local news outlets are torn about who is to blame for the tragedy. Per this article, al-Qaeda has claimed responsibility. However, the belief locally is that the Mungiki Cult carried out this crime. By the time you read this, it is likely, and hopeful, that we all know more. In the mean time, we can only pray for the wounded and for the families of the deceased.

Explosion rocks central Nairobi

At least one person has been killed and several others injured in a blast in Kenya's capital, Nairobi, police say.

Witnesses say the explosion happened outside a cafe near the Ambassador Hotel in the centre of the city.

Initial reports suggest a suicide bomber carried out the attack but this has not been confirmed.

The area has been sealed off by police and the military. The blast was close to the site of the 1998 US embassy bombing which killed 213 people.

The al-Qaeda network said it carried out that attack.

Monday's explosion happened at about 0800 local time (0500 GMT) outside the City Gate Restaurant.

It remains unclear if it was a suicide bomber.

One eyewitness told the BBC from hospital that he was knocked to the floor by a man running away just before the explosion.

Robert Maritim said he had been having his shoes shined near the blast and believed the man killed was a street sweeper.

Another witness said a man detonated a bomb inside the cafe. Other reports said it was a grenade blast outside.

Shop windows nearby were shattered and the area has now been cordoned off as anti-terrorist police with sniffer dogs comb the scene for further explosives.

Police later said one person had been killed and about six others injured in the blast.

Torn pieces of the Koran were found near a body outside the cafe but at this stage it is not clear if they are linked to this attack, the BBC's Karen Allen in Nairobi says.

Last week, more than 30 people were killed in Nairobi during a three-day police crackdown on suspected members of the outlawed Mungiki sect.

Countdown

We went in search of suitcases today. Hidden hither and thither throughout the apartment we finally found the collection of bags that will be joining us on our separate trips back the Real World: Hubby at the end of the month and me in just a few days. Yes, my friends, I will be back in the Real World by the end of the week. *bounce*

The only down side to my homecoming is the 14 hour journey from Dubai to New York – in economy. *sob* I called to find out if I could upgrade to business class and the kind lady laughed at me and told me that it would cost me oodles of miles and money to do so. Thus I will be jetting home whilst jammed into an economy seat for fourteen hours!! *sob* And with my luck, I’ll probably end up sitting next to someone to who smells, or snores, or worse, who wants to talk!

So please don’t hold it against me if I’m not looking forward to my trip home. I’m sure that the Real World is still the lovely place I left behind and that all of you are excited to see me. But until my magical powers kick in so that I wiggle my nose, bob my head, or snap my fingers to arrive immediately at my destination… Until then, my friends, I will go only resignedly to my airplane fate.

Justice is so Hot

At first it seemed that this week would end on a low note – Inmate #9818783 (aka Paris Hilton) had been released for “house arrest” to serve out the remainder of her sentence. Poor thing was going to be stuck in her private pad where, just hours after her arrival, free gifts, friends, and paparazzi were arriving to welcome her home. Thank god for Judge Michael Sauer!

The good judge, you see, had the wild and crazy notion that just because Paris a rich celebutante that she didn’t deserve to be let out of the punishment he had imposed. She went to Mommy (the LA County Sheriff) behind Daddy’s back. And now Dad’s pissed.

Yay Judge!!

Is it wrong that hearing she was back in jail made me so happy I shouted with glee? Is it somehow mean of me that the photo on the top of today’s blog makes me smile every time I look at it? I think that Lily Allen put it best:

“At first when I see you cry,
yeah it makes me smile, yeah it makes me smile
At worst I feel bad for a while,
but then I just smile I go ahead and smile.”

So while she’s screaming out, "It's not right!" and looking for Mama Hilton, the rest of us can look on in ill disguised glee and say, “Now, that’s hot!”

You're a Superstar!

I realize that crediting 'Ren as my muse two days in a row for could set a dangerous precedent in terms of her “fragile” ego. But this one is too awesome not to share with my favourite Devoted Readers.

Enjoy!

I Hate Plumbers

I cannot explain just how much the title of today’s entry accurately reflects my feelings right now. In fact, hate may be too mild a word: loathe and despise might be slightly more accurate. In case you haven’t already guessed, I had plumbers in the house today. That’s what they called themselves in any case.

*deep breath*

I wrote a blog explaining why I hate plumbers but at about page four of the diatribe I realized that I was being a tad verbose. Thus I have elected to regale you all with my tale of plumbing woe when I am less irate and can squeeze it into a few witty comments. Or at least when my anger can be condensed into slightly less than four pages of Times New Roman eight-point font.

Now then, since I believe that everyone should leave my blogging home with a free gift with(out) purchase I give you: The Helicopter Game. ‘Ren introduced to me to this addictive game and she learned about it over at our mutual home, ecfans. Play once and you’ll be stuck in front of your computer for hours.

You’re welcome.

Dubai Sweet Dubai

After several days of silence I have returned to the blogosphere with some real updates! In case you were worried about us or missed us during the silence, Hubby and I left last Thursday afternoon for a much-deserved weekend away from Kenya. Y’all know how much I love (most of the time) my life here in Nai-Robbery, but let’s face it – the need to escape into the Real World on a semi-regular basis goes hand-in-hand with living in the developing world.

During our trip, Hubby devised a new logo for our favorite Emirate: “Las Vegas for Adults.” Sure there isn’t any gambling and nakedness is generally frowned upon in the UAE but those aren’t the things that I really look for in a vacation spot. Dubai has it all: five star dining, first class shopping, and comfortable hotels designed to make you want to extend your stay for a day or two. Heck, we even found all-you-can-eat buffets that would put Vegas to shame! The final similarity would have to be the heat in this desert oasis. When your glasses steam up the moment you exit your air-conditioned hotel, you know it’s a wee bit humid outside.

One of the definite highlights of this trip was dinner at Verre, the Gordon Ramsay restaurant at the Hilton. Despite opting against the prix fixe we were still presented with a meal consisting of no less than seven courses. The meal opened with a selection petit fours, which included a truffle cream puff that was so divinely rich that I may or may not have stolen Hubby’s. From there we moved onto an amuse bouche of gazpacho, our individual appetizers and main courses, a “pre-dessert,” dessert, truffles, and then they brought us even more chocolate. The entire meal was not only expertly prepared but the service was attentive without being overbearing. By the time we paid the bill we were both slightly intoxicated and had sufficiently achieved what my Aunt T would call “an elegant sufficiency.”

I suppose that I can’t talk about our weekend in Dubai without mentioning the Mall of the Emirates where we gave my Visa card a healthy workout. They must pump drugs into the air of that mall because I bought several pink items insisting they were “cute and pink” – and I don’t even like pink.

The lowlight of our adventure was lunch at the Mall. Shockingly, I headed straight for McDonald’s where I ordered a Big Mac combo… That I hated! *sob* I could barely finish this ultimate sign of the Real World; and you all know I have been dreaming about it for ages. Yet my Mac tasted greasy and not quite like I remembered. Hubby said that it was a sign that I was maturing. *sob* Next thing you know, they’ll start calling me an adult and expect me to know what I want to be when I grow up. *sob*

The only other cool thing we did in Dubai was going to Wild Wadi Water Park. I wanted to go skiing but Pouty Baby said that he had never skied and really wanted to go down the water slides at this popular tourist hotspot. After a few hours of lazing in “rivers,” screaming down slides, and trying to drown each other in the wave pool, we finally headed back to the hotel. Best of all, Hubby didn’t even get a sunburn!

That was our weekend in civilization. And now we’re back in Nairobi and I couldn’t be happier. Like I said, needing to get out of town for a few days is natural around here but so is the pleasure of coming Home.

‘Tater Cool

I’m not normally one to post news from TMZ but this was too awesome not to share. The new “Transformers” movie looks beyond lame but this is one promotional tie-in that I may actually buy.

Mr. Potato Head on his own – not so much.
Mr. Potato Head dressed up as Optimus Prime – I am so there!

More Than Meets the Fries

Regardless of how well the upcoming "Transformers" movie does -- the real news is Optimash Prime -- and Mr. Potato Head.

The folks over at Hasbro have transformed Mr. Potato Head into the ultimate robot leader. The Optimash Prime action figure, like all of his Potato Head brethren, comes with mix-and-match pieces -- even a sweet Magnum P.I. moustache! Nothing strikes fear into the electronic soul of a Decepticon like a bad moustache!

Now all we need is a Megatater Decepticon for ultimate spud-on-spud warfare.

Birthday Time!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MUMMY!!